as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Randomize
