I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
