I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize