She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
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