If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
he just fucked me for my cheese.
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