I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
Randomize