She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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