I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Randomize
