I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
