i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I don't think brook has ever known best
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Randomize
