This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
