I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
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