We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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