i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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