My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Randomize