none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Randomize
