Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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