i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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