And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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