I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
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