Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Randomize
