So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize