Sober January is a disaster.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Randomize
