we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
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