We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Randomize
