guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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