I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
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