I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Randomize
