He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Randomize
