she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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