I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
