Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Randomize
