I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
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