I'm gonna have a badass scar
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Randomize
