is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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