Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
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