I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Randomize
