its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
Randomize