He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
You have to summon your inner elephant
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
Randomize
