he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
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