Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
