I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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