I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
i think im in europe. pls send help
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
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