Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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