Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Randomize
