Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
I haven't been this sober since birth.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize
