I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
I understand Curling. That high.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
