The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
