butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Randomize
