You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
