I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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