bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
Randomize
